You are SO Not Invited!
Has this happened to you yet?
You’re newly engaged– glowing, beaming with pride, looking divalicious at some family or social function, and someone says, “I can’t wait to see you in your dress! We’ll be at the wedding!”
The music stops.
The record scratches.
Then you hear crickets.
Why? Because this whole time you’re thinking…”I didn’t invite you…nor did I plan to”. I know, it’s rough. So what’s a wedding diva to do in this predicament? I know a lot of you are thinking you should just smile and nod your head, and then quickly excuse yourself. Good! But that doesn’t solve your problem. Hopefully, you have someone to run interference for you: a mom, sister, aunt, etc. Someone close to the planning and to you to speak for you, if you are uncomfortable. Wedding planners can do this too, but we are so far removed from the situation, guests think “Oh, that applies to everyone else. That doesn’t mean me”. Dads can go one of two ways: be extremely blunt and say, “Nope, you’re not invited” or totally cave.
Send in the estrogen.
Some tried and true responses are:
- “XXX and XXX would love for you to come, but they have limited the guest list to _______” (Pick your poison here: close family and friends, adults only, fifty people on each side, first cousins, local relatives, etc.)
- “XXX and XXX are just doing a small reception after the ceremony with the immediate family, but are doing a bigger party for friends and extended family about a month later. Let me get your address so that we can send you an invitation!” (Make sure this is true!)
Whatever you do, try to avoid waiting. It’s awkward. Deal with it right then and there. This way, you can avoid them calling around to other family and friends to get your wedding details and showing up later.