Somebody’s going to be mad.

I’ve heard it all at this point.  There are a lot of “arrognorant” (the lethal mix of arrogance and ignorance plaguing the world) advice going around now that it is wedding season.  Once again, I feel it is prevalent because of the horrible economic tides we are trying to tame as well as the overall lack of public trust in any practically any business (Thanks, AIG, Freddie, Fannie, Madoff and countless others!  You’re a swell bunch).

What’s (the lie) going around now is that it’s smarter to tell your vendors that you are planning a “big party!”  rather than a wedding, because everyone knows that entertainment/event vendors are out to rip everyone off the minute they say “The W word”.  So to combat that, and to make sure you protect what’s left of your 401K, you decide to lie to everyone.

It’s like going to the doctor, tell the staff that you have a terrible stomach ache.  Once you’ve been whisked back into the doctor’s examining room, you reveal “Just kidding. I’m really pregnant and in labor right now. I know when you guys hear the word ‘maternity’,  the prices double”.

Great way to start a relationship. (That was sarcasm)

Trust is a two way street.   Your wedding vendors are trusting that you will pay them on time.  So that, in turn, they can pay their staff, mortgages and gas and electric bills on time. They are also trusting that you will keep your date and follow-through with an actual event.  More likely than not,they have turned down other events so that they could show you exemplary client service and attention.  When you lie to them from the beginning (because they will find out that it’s an actual wedding, and not some “big party”), they have no incentive to trust you, let alone like you.  It will make your vendor feel as if you questioned their integrity without communicating any concerns, and decided to deceive them for your own benefit (a little pot calling the kettle black, eh?).

In case this piece of info isn’t printed in anyone’s wedding magazine or allowed to run rampant on a wedding message board, I’ll say it here:  wedding vendors are a tight community. If you feel the need to try to get over on any of your wedding vendors with lies and deception, you had better believe that other wedding vendors will hear about it, too.  It could  make it a lot harder for you to find other vendors that will want to work with you once they have heard about your antics.   A wedding is not just a big party.  It’s your wedding. Don’t take anything away from that by calling it something that it isn’t. If it were really just “one big party”, then why not go to the courthouse and rock out at Chuck E. Cheese?  There very well may be some unscrupulous vendors out there who mark their prices up because it’s a wedding, and some may feel warranted in doing so due to the expectations and other details they will have to deal with.   For the rest of us that run our businesses honestly, we have set our prices for the amount of work we do.  As a wedding planner, it is my job to make sure that brides and grooms get what they are looking for and that any wedding day related charges are services are legitimate.  If you run into several mark ups with venues or vendors that you have dreamt of using, it may be time to find vendors you can actually afford to use. If you find someone who is less than honest about their fees—do not book them!

But remember, a stomach ache is not the same thing as being in labor 😉

I’m sure my other wedding planner and vendor friends will be able to offer so much more insight, so let’s keep the conversation going.

:: Photo ~ Bjorn de Leeuw ::