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Overheard at Your Wedding: “I’m Hot/Cold”

Wedding Advice

 

 

Nothing is worse than being too hot, or too cold.  It’s uncomfortable, dreadful and can have such a horrid effect on your appearance. You can be only so  fabulous in extreme weather. 

 

If your wedding is in a hot season/climate:  Be sure to think ahead, for your guests’ sakes.  While you are tucked away inside, preparing for your grand entrance, your guests will be outside enjoying your prelude music.  Opt to have tea, lemonade and water available or served as guests arrive to the ceremony.  This quick refresher can rejuvenate the excitement for your pending nuptials. In addition to programs, have hostesses pass out fans to keep guests cool. 

If your reception, too, will be outdoors, be sure to opt for a tent to shield guests from the sun.  Tents now come with fans and air conditioning units to keep guests cool during dinner. 

 

If your wedding is in a cool season/climate:  If your venues have fireplaces, seek to use them for the aesthetic it provides, but also for practical reasons.  The warm heat will serve to warm your venue and also create a festive wintery ambiance that adds a personal touch to the event experience.  Serve warm signature drinks like hot toddies, gourmet hot chocolates, warm ciders, etc. during your cocktail hour to greet guests coming in from the cold. 

 

In extreme weather, guests will always head to where they are most comfortable—be it inside at a sweltering outdoor wedding or to the closest heat source for a wedding held in the cooler months.  This will always throw a monkey wrench into the great festivities you’ve had planned. 

 

 

Photos :: Source + Source

Event Vision 101: Scale Up

Wedding Advice

eventvision101

At times, it is far easier to think about your details and their place in the grand scheme of things, rather than to be overwhelmed with all of them at once.  Instead of thinking of the entire reception, think of one table.  This is the only table that needs your attention, the only table that will convey your event’s personality. 

 

Close your eyes. 

 

Tell me about it.

 

What colors are on the table?  Are they deep and rich?  Soft and light?  Run your hand across the table—what textures do you feel?  Soft satin?  Crinkly bichon? How does the table make you feel?  What about your place setting and glasses?  Is it modern or traditional?  Eclectic or romantic?  Do you feel an ambient glow on your face?  Is it coming from small votives?  Thick pillars, or floating candles?

 

Take a whiff.

Which fragrant aromas are present? Open your eyes—what flowers are on your table? What do their containers look like?  Glass or silver vases? Tall, square or cylinder?  Low to the table?  What shape is your table—oblong or round? What about your chairs—are they casual or elegant? Think about a quiet dinner with your  love, and holding hands across this beautifully designed table. If the table was the only thing in the room, where would you feel that you were?  The key is to create an experience at each table for all guests to enjoy, and duplicate it for the remaining tables. You could choose to create a slightly different experience, by using different linens or centerpieces. 

 

Start small, scale up. 

The Lie the Wedding Magazine Told You…

Featured, Terrica Talk, Wedding Advice

oxycleanguy

I’m not the Oxy Clean guy.

There is never a “But WAIT!  There’s MORE!” moment with me.

There is no “but if you call right now, we’ll double the offer” moment.

Ever.

Just to clarify, I’m not this guy either:

I sell provide a service that includes my creativity and expertise. It does not consist of discounts.

While that’s not the “lie” that they told you outright, I feel that we should clear up a tragic misconception.  This misconception has been flagrant in the economic climate where the funds that were once set aside for your wedding have been diminished and depleted.  Everyone is looking to save money. I don’t blame you.

So, the thing that really molds my lip gloss is when the glossies and some blogs perpetuate the role of a wedding planner as a walking talking coupon code or Entertainment Book (remember how you had to sell those in school?).  I believe they say things like “A good wedding planner will save you money with her vendor relationships, who in turn will provide you with discounts”.

Oh, really? No. Not quite.

Let me tell you what a good wedding planner will do:

  • A good wedding planner will never publicly or privately purport to you that she can get you exorbitant discounts.  This is something that is never guaranteed.  Unless, she is discounting her own service and pricing.
  • A good wedding planner will save you money by matching you with vendors that fit against his/her stringent wedding budget and event vision criteria.  S/he already knows who to go to—s/he knows which vendors to go to for what it is you need that will be in your price range and maximize your dollar for your event vision. By doing the footwork of research, preliminary and sample orders for you, s/he has saved you time.  Which is almost the same as saving you money.
  • A good wedding planner will always pass along any professional courtesies to his/her clients and refrain from taking kickbacks or markups on the client’s order.
  • A good wedding planner understands that to get “the best deal” or price is relative to each particular client. The best “deal” may be a completely non-traditional workup of the menu that the caterer does not typically do, or a service or product upgrade.
  • A good wedding planner has worked years for his/her vendor relationships, and continues to do so; s/he does not violate, abuse, or manipulate them in such a casual manner,as some of the antiquated wedding advice columns perceive.  S/he knows, not only as a creative professional, but a business owner, the enumerable costs of overhead, taxes, staff salaries, etc. that factors into a vendor’s pricing.  S/he appreciates when discounts are given to her clients, but knows that they are always at the vendor’s discretion, and never guaranteed.

  • A good wedding planner will tell you this.

A good client will not rely on potential discounts, but can plan their wedding on a budget they can actually afford. They understand the ??less is more” concept, understanding that if budget is truly an issue, the guest list may need to be cut, or the vision may need to be scaled back.

Check out other wedding planning myths you can’t afford to believe.

Overheard at Your Wedding: “I’m Starving”

Wedding Advice

So not cool.

 

 

Not sure if you know this or not—or read it one of the three thousand wedding glossies you’ve bought, but I’m your girl. You know I’ll tell you.

 

People come to weddings to eat.

 

They get your invitation, skip right to the RSVP and begin salivating at all of the wonderful things they will taste and experience at your wedding (and expense). Don’t worry, they’re excited about seeing you, too.  Who wouldn’t be? The perk is definitely the succulent food you will grace them with during your reception.

 

So, imagine their surprise when they arrive at 6 p.m. to your cocktail hour to be greeted with a cheese and cracker tray and ornate display of strawberries resting in a well-carved watermelon.  No worries, they think—you are just cleansing the palate before the true feast begins.  Lo and behold, they arrive to “dinner” which is either stations of hors d’oeuvres for six year olds or a plated meal with such scant portions that only a butterfly could be satisfied with.

 

They start to get antsy.  They start to get bored.  They start to drink more.  Dinner started at 7 p.m.  At 7:03 they are ready to go.

 

Now, don’t get mad at me.  If that is all you can afford, then that’s okay.  What is not okay is not planning accordingly or letting your guests know ahead of time so that they can make adequate arrangements for food prior to the wedding.  Here are some helpful tips to spearhead the thundering stampede of guests leaving during your cake cutting to graze on the lawn of the reception venue:

  • If you have limited funds, as always—consider lowering your guest count.  You can do more for less, than vice versa.
  • If you choose to keep your large number of guests, consider having a brunch or tea reception with a limited menu.  Of course, you could also have a late evening wedding, with your ceremony beginning at 7:00 or 8:00 in the evening and an even later reception.  At this late hour, your guests won’t be expecting a heavy meal.  In this instance, you could get away with a heavy hors d’oeuvres menu.
  • Be sure to spread the news on your wedding website, and if necessary and/or appropriate on your reception cards. You can never give your guests too much information.  Far better to let them know in advance than to hear them (and their stomachs) grumbling about how they wished they had known about the food.
  • Another reason why a lot of guests walk away hungry is that they feel the menu is too exotic or something they just won’t eat.  While at your tasting, remember, you are accommodating a large guest list, not just you and your future spouse.  Uncle Bob may love foie gras all day long, but Aunt Millie would refuse to eat it.  Try to find a common ground.  The same thing can be said for wedding cake; choose a basic failsafe flavor options that will ensure you don’t have an entire cake left behind.

 

 

Photo :: Source

10 Tips from 10 Wedding Planners

Featured, Wedding Advice

tips

One of the benefits of reading wedding blogs is that you get so much insight from fellow planners and brides.  I decided to ask some of the planners I think are outstanding to share a few of their favorite tips with Fabuluxe™ readers. Be sure to check them out, too!

“Hire vendors you trust, then let them do their jobs.”  Sara Bauleke • Bella Notte
“Start work on your seating assignments early as this becomes a MAJOR task as you get closer to the wedding…. when you make your guest list, purchase plain white, cheap paper plates and a pack of sticky notes…..write each guests name on a sticky note and arrange them in groups by family, friends or co workers around the paper plate about 8-10 on a plate ( as most 60” round banquet tables seat 8-10).”

Mark Kingsdorf • Queen of Hearts Weddings | BLOG
“Do you dread negotiating with vendors on their prices?  Wedding vendors need to support their lives too so most aren’t willing to drop their fees just because you ask.  The best way to get a good deal is to tell the vendor what amount you’re able to spend.  Then see how they can customize their services to fit your budget.  Perhaps the photographer will knock out the parent album that you don’t need anyway.  Maybe the DJ will leave the spinning club lights at home.  Or perhaps the caterer will suggest that you skip the mini dessert buffet and only serve wedding cake.  You may be surprised at how customized your vendors will make their packages in order to earn your business.” Laura Auer • Wish Special Events | BLOG
“Don’t get caught up in a particular shade of “pink” or “blue” when choosing your colors!  Different hues of a color will give your decor and overall wedding style that “designer” look.  Gone are the days of everything matching as well.  Bridesmaids dresses in gradient shades is a HAUTE look!”
Wendy Robinson • Sacred Moment Weddings | BLOG
“If you really want a unique wedding, stop looking for inspiration in wedding magazines.” Monica Gill •   The White Box | BLOG
“If having an outdoor ceremony, be considerate of your bridesmaids who may be wearing heals.  Consider purchasing them Solemates It keeps them from sinking into the grass.”  Latrice Cushenberry •  Bridal Opulence Weddings and Events | BLOG
“Keep all wedding related information in one place. Don’t have piles all over the house, and one at work, and one in the car, and don’t forget about the one that you have in the bathroom.  If you keep all of your wedding contracts, correspondence, emails, pages you’ve pulled out of magazines in one place, you will feel more organized. And if you need something, you will know exactly where it is. If your wedding consultant asks to see a copy of the contract, you know where it is – if you need to check the floral order, you know where it is.”

Melissa DiStefano •  MasterPiece Weddings | BLOG
“Consider a brunch reception if you are planning your wedding on a shoestring.”  Shanika Butts • SJB Weddings and Events | BLOG
“Add a line item to your budget for vendors that need to receive gratuities such as limo drivers, beauticians, etc. This can add up and it is so important to account for it at the beginning.”  Saundra Hadley • Planning…Forever |  BLOG
“Make the timeline realistic and plan for all the activities you want. For instance, if you want to take pictures before the ceremony, please don’t ask the bridal party to show up only 2 hours before the ceremony, then say “If they’re late, then they won’t be in the pictures.”In reality you are going to WAIT for them because those are your friends or MOTHER,  and you really want them to be in the photos.  Plan accordingly to avoid any tardiness, tantrums and hurt feelings.”

Katasha Butler •  K.Sherrie + Co. | BLOG

Thank you to all of the planners that were so gracious with their time to participate. You all offered some wonderful tips and I know you will create more fabulous events in 2009.  Stay tuned for more tips from other wedding pros.

Overheard at Your Wedding: “I’m Bored”

Terrica Talk, Wedding Advice

 

Ugh, I know.  It’s tragic.

 

You’ve spent all of this money on food, entertainment and decor—yet, your guests are looking at their watches, pleading with their eyes for you to cut the cake so they can get out of Dodge.  Why?  Well, for several reasons. But the one blaring is that they are bored senseless.  As a destination wedding planner in a beautiful area, I always encourage my couples to really make the party as fun as possible.  You have a lot of guests that have traveled a long way to celebrate.  To be bored while attending an event they have spent heavily on is sacrilege.

Here are some suggestions for to avoid the “zzz’s factor” during your reception:

 

  • Don’t front load—Unless your timeline specifically calls for it and cannot be rearranged, avoid piling everything at the beginning of your reception.  Some couples think it’s best to get “everything out of the way” by doing the first dance, father-daughter dance, mother-son dance and cake cutting all at the same time.  It doesn’t have the same effect that you think it will. For example, your father-daughter dance will seem endearing for the first few moments, but will lose its meaning when piled together with other events.  Think of doing your first dance as soon as you are announced, and then move to dinner.  By keeping your guests intrigued and interested in the events to come, you can keep their attention.  Otherwise, you risk performing for guests and having them sit through it, instead of enjoying it with you.
  • Choose music that everyone will like—Once you receive your response cards, take a look at your guests. You know their likes and dislikes. Keep your must-play list balanced and try not to cater to one portion of your guest list. For example, we had a great reception with a few older guests, but a majority were young and excited about being at the reception. The couple and their parents requested that certain music not be played, out of respect for the older guests.  The only problem is that the younger guests were bored out of their minds and were turned away each time they made requests with the DJ. 
  • Get people involved–  If you have traditions to your culture or family, definitely include your guests!  At one of our weddings, the groom and his brother performed the dabke to traditional Palestinian music.  Even though they were the only two of their culture at the entire wedding, they had every single guest on the dance floor with them, learning and performing the dance. If you don’t have or know a traditional dance—learn one, and teach it to your guests! It truly beats YMCA or The Chicken Dance.
  • Keep people moving, but together–  Think about having different locations for your cocktail hour and reception. This is perfect if you are having your wedding on some interesting and aesthetic grounds.  Allow your guests to explore different areas and not be confined to one spot.  The same can be achieved on a smaller scale with bars and stations.  Keep your guests moving and increase their mingling ratio.  Be sure to keep them together, though.  Guests can feel slighted if they are, or even feel, like they  are, separated from the rest of the party.  Be sure to take this into account when considering the logistics and floor plan of your day.

 

Source :: sxc.hu

Event Vision 101: Personality

Wedding Advice

eventvision101

 

Finding your event’s personality is crucial.  I no longer like to say the term “theme” because it’s a bit antiquated and can be a bit stifling.  However, just like a theme, having more than one at your event can be confusing and distracting.  No good ever came out of anything with multiple personalities—this includes your wedding.  Your  event’s personality could be inspired by color, a location, a jewel, an era, or even food!  How does it make you feel when you think of it?  What does it make you want to do the second the thought of it enters your mind?  In other words, if your event were a person, who would it be?  How would it smell?  What would it look like?  How would it feel? 

Starting off with very basic questions in the beginning of your planning process can be helpful to get you to discover facets of your design that you hadn’t originally considered. Also, asking them halfway through your planning allows you to make sure you are staying on track and can steer away from an event vision exorcism. 

Ask yourself—if your long lost friend had missed your wedding, how would you describe it to them?  What would you create that would be the most memorable for you, as well as your guests?  Could you sum up your event vision in just five words?  What words or feelings would then stem from that? 

 

You will find that your event’s personality is born right before your eyes.

Screen Printing Workshop at DIY Bride

Wedding Advice, Wedding Sugar

 

 

Khris of DIY Bride is hosting a Screen Printing workshop and it is a genius idea!  Think of all the wonderful things you could create for your wedding, new home, or gifts. 

from the DIY Bride blog:

This printing technique is perfect for all sorts of surfaces such as paper, fabric, glass, wood, and even metal. With so many possibilities it’s a great skill to learn for making nifty wedding items. Think invitations, t-shirts, aisle runners, bridesmaid bags… or get ultra creative and come up with your own implementation.

What You’ll Learn:

  • Introduction to art – Learn what images will work and what won’t.
  • How to create screens
  • All about ink
  • Basic equipment 101
  • How to make a print

Each video lesson is divided into short, doable tasks that will have you up and running with screen printing in no time. Because this is a self-paced workshop, you can stop, rewind, and restart the videos as many times as needed.

Registration opens on April 16, so be sure to stay tuned for your list of supplies and more information over at the DIY Bride blog. 

Hot 5 Under $75 : Groomsmen Gifts

Wedding Advice

 

Hot5-under75

Looking for some great gifts for your guys?  Fear not, oh fab one—here are some great ideas to get you started.  Below are some hot picks that could cater to every type of groomsmen—the metro, the lover, the geek and the renaissance man. 

 

Brushed Nickel Accessories Box from Red Envelope

Small box retails for $49.95 + $9.95 for engraving

Large box retails for $69.95

 

 
  Multipoint Bluetooth® Headset from Brookstone

Retails for $59.95

The Art of Shaving Carry On Kit from Art of Shaving

Retails for $50

Nice Collective Nico card holder from Nice Collective

Retails for $75
Gucci Por Homme II 
Retails for $65

Four ‘Secrets’ You Shouldn’t Keep From Your Planner

Terrica Talk, Wedding Advice

The secret

 

If you want a successful and productive relationship with your event team, keeping secrets are a “no-no”—yes, even accidentally on purpose. It is similar to the relationship with your doctor or lawyer; if you want us to really help you, we do need to know everything.  I typically tell my clients what my Contract Law professor told me:  “Clients should tell you everything, and you can decide what’s not important”.  This is very true, and rings true in our profession.  We represent you to your caterer, florist, venue—practically everyone you come in contact with.  Therefore, it is imperative that we always stay on the same page.  Lack of communication and embarrassment can and has been the downfall of what could have been beautiful weddings.

 

1. The budget changes  If for any reason your budget increases or decreases, you need to let your planner know as soon as possible.  Your planner bases his/her recommendations based on the event’s personality, the dynamic between you and the vendor providing a service, but also on your budget.   Any changes in your budget may put you in a different price bracket—either allowing you to choose between a higher caliber vendor or cause you find a more economical resource.  Fear not, your planner can help you by creating a new set of priority shifts to meet your new budget to ensure you get what you want and need.

 

2.  The family dynamic is off  Some families have issues—others have subscriptions.  And that is okay.  If your parents are divorced and your mother would like to literally rip the face off of your stepmother or if the groom’s brother is the undependable black sheep of the family, your planner needs to know.  To avoid any gaffes at the rehearsal or planning of the day, be sure to let her know of any rough edges either family may have.  If you feel more comfortable discussing these potential pitfalls with your planner one-on-one, definitely take the time to do so.  Your planner does this often enough to be able to foresee any mishaps and help you avoid them.

 

3.  Critical vendor changes  We want you to be proactive with all of your vendors, just be sure to keep us in the loop.  If you ordered 20 burgundy bichon table linens, but then change it to 25 merlot lamours, your planner definitely needs to know.  If you fire a vendor or change their service, it’s best to let your planner know as soon as possible.  Do not assume that a change is too small to notify your planner; one simple change can cause a logistical nightmare.  Since s/he will be responsible for confirming services and executing your day, having the latest, correct information is not optional.

 

4.  You are not happy with his/her service  Do not suffer in silence.  Your planner is there to assist and guide you, not to be a hindrance to you enjoying your planning and special day.  If your expectations are not being met, please bring them to your planner’s attention.  Ask your planner if you could have an outline as to when you should expect certain things to be done.  I am quite sure that your planner will welcome the opportunity to better assist you.

 

Remember: open lines of communication…always.