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St. Simons Wedding Planner :: Island Destination Weddings | Wedding Advice
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Me, You and Your Cocktail Hour: Japanese Style

 

The sweet sounds of a shamisen greatly complements this week’s theme:  our Japanese style cocktail hour.  The flavors have a component that appeal to everyone’s palates:  bold, light, spicy, sweet.

 

Daikon-Papaya Summer Rolls with Minted Yogurt Sauce from Food and Wine

 

This is the perfect signature hors d’oeuvres that is meatless, but still flavorful.  It is guaranteed to awaken the palate and prepare it for whatever savory dishes you will have to follow for dinner.  These light and sweet flavors pack a punch!  Serve in shot glasses so that guests can enjoy their own serving of the Yogurt Sauce.

 

 

 

 

 

Sakura (Cherry blossom)

 

?”Awamori” 40 ml
?Apricot brandy 10 ml
?Lemon juice 10 ml
?Creme de cassis tsp 1

 

 

Awamori is a Japanese liquor similar to Sake.  It is rich and full flavored, so it will surely leave an impression! 

Jump the Broom in Style

 

Going generations back, this tradition goes back to the slave era when blacks were forbidden to marry.  To prove their matrimonial commitment to themselves and their community, the couple would physically jump over a broom to symbolize their leap in to married life.  African American couples frequently tie in the tradition of “jumping the broom” at the close of their ceremonies.

 

You can find custom brooms online at places like African-Weddings, Wedding Brooms by Alicia, or you can make one yourself.

.::Photo by Brian Dorsey::.

 

 

Designing your own broom is something you can ask your florist to do.  You can pick out a broom at a local craft store, or they can get one for you.  If your florist does your broom, you will find that it will be in consistent in design with the rest of your arrangements. S/he can use the same color and type of ribbon for the broom’s handle as used on your bouquets, right down to the braid pattern.  Flowers from your bouquet can be incorporated, too.  You can offer similar customizations such as adding lockets of those you wish to remember, or even lockets of your own parents’ wedding photos to symbolize the joining of your two families.  When your child or sibling gets married it can be passed along to them too.  Most couples save their brooms and put them on display in their homes.  If you choose to do this, make sure that you use sturdy materials when creating your broom. 

 

Depending on how ceremonial you would like to get with your broom jumping, you can have your officiant bring it out from a hidden area.  As an alternative, you can have an honored relative or even a young child bring forth the broom and place it before you. 

Above picture from Your Wedding Day

Are You in Need of a Bridal Bailout?

 

With all the talk of congressional bailouts to banks, auto and insurance companies– surely, by now you are hoping for a mandate that will extend to bridal couples for their weddings.

 

Well, while you are waiting on that, let me give you some tips that will help you in the meantime…

 

You can initiate your own bridal bailout by fully and realistically assessing the scale of your wedding. 

  1. Can you cut your guest list?
  2. Can you change the time or day of your wedding?
  3. Can any orders or services be scaled back

These three starting points will seem really hard to do.  If you are serious about affording your wedding and not paying it off at your fifth anniversary, they will be necessary.  With the economy having everyone tightening their belts, more and more couples and their families will have to reconsider their contributions to the wedding budget.  Each person’s circumstances are different, and it will be up to them to decide how much they can oblige their finances too.  Nevertheless, it shouldn’t be held hostage to the idea of a “dream wedding” when the realities are harsher than ever. 

 

This week, we will debut Operation: Recessionista, a series of posts that will show you the how’s and why’s of having a wedding on a strict budget.  Part of the frustration of most couples is not knowing the cost of services when they start planning, so they enter into the process with an inflated and unrealistic view of weddings.  Frustration can turn into utter despair when it seems like nothing is affordable for them.  Operation: Recessionista will give you tips for an affordable and beautiful wedding without sacrificing feelings, decorum  or overall event vision. 

Courthouse Couture…For Him

Last week, we discussed looking fabulous for your civil ceremony.  We’ll give the guys the same riot act that we gave the ladies– “Don’t T-Shirt and jeans it!” We could go a step further and ask that you refrain from the typical oxford shirt and khaki pants.  You’re getting married…not giving a book report.  You could go jacketless, with your tie, but then you would look like a corporate guy on his lunch break.  Nevertheless, it’s still an opportunity to showcase your style in different ways. Just as you would if you were getting tuxes, find out what color she is wearing or let her help you pick a look if she is ultra-CIA operative about her dress.  You want to make sure that you both coordinate and complement each other.  In your case, you have the wonderful opportunity in investing in a suit or blazer– which is the gift that keeps giving since it can be worn at several different events in different ways.  With velvet making a comeback and depending on your build, rocking a sportscoat is a great trendy option, as long as you don’t look like you’re wearing a smoking jacket.  You could go ultra-mod by wearing your jacket with a wide collard shirt or traditional in a suit and tie.  While classic suit colors like black and navy are always a win-win, depending on your season and complexion, a steel grey, tan or light beige might even work in your favor.  Truly, your possibilities are endless!

 

 

 

 

 

BOSS Black ‘Movie’ Suit in Beige :: Burberry Two Button Sportcoat in Grey/Tobacco ::  Theory ‘Proper’ Blazer in Black ::  two a.m. Velvet Blazer in Espresso ::

Andrew Fezza Tan Tic Three-Button Suit :: Pronto Uomo Couture Charcoal Two-Button Suit :: Joseph & Feiss Resort Three-Button, Non-Vent,Tan Silk Suit :: Versini Three-Button, Non-Vented Black Suit ::

Virtual Reality: Cocktails & Details Soiree

Cocktails and Details Virtual Soiree
Want a team of the hottest wedding planners to help you with your wedding?  Done!
Fabuluxe is excited to announce our first virtual event, Cocktails & Details: Virtual Soiree on December 4th.  We are extending invitations to a select number of brides whose weddings are in 2009.  Here is your chance to pow wow with the industry’s and blogosphere’s hottest wedding planners!  Ask questions, get advice and be fabulous in a comfortable, relaxed setting.
Would you like an ultra-exclusive invite?  Just comment below or send in your request to blog {at} fabuluxeinc dot com. Simply let us know your wedding date and be sure to let us know where we can find your wedding website or blog.    We’ll get you on the guest list!
Stay tuned for more fabulous details!

Me, You and Your Cocktail Hour: Margarita Style

 

Looking to infuse culture and spice into your cocktail hour?  Let’s go south of the border for inspiration!  While spicy foods are not for everyone, you can always choose an alternative to serve in addition to your signature hors d’oeuvres or offer a milder version with a little less heat.  Be sure note to lose the essence, flavor and personality that these offer!  For extra effect–have a mariachi band or flamenco dancer entertain your guests as they enjoy on this delicious fare. 

 

Black Bean and Chorizo Stuffed Chiles  (from Food and Wine)

This recipe uses mild chilies such as Anaheims and New Mexico which will increase the odds that it will be favored by all of your guests.  Flavored with cumin and oregano, the stuffed sausage adds a savory tastes to the chiles’ semi-fruity favor.

 

 

 

 

  Watermelon Margarita

 1-½ oz. tequila
¾ oz. triple sec
¾ oz. Midori
2 oz. sour mix
6 oz. cubed, seeded watermelon
8 oz. ice

 

Blend watermelon until liquid and add Tequila, Triple Sec and sour mix. Pour Midori in each glass and top with watermelon mixture.  Add ice.  Garnish with watermelon.  Sugar can be added to watermelon mixture to sweeten.  This can also be made as a frozen margarita with a glass rimmed with salt or sugar.

To Fee or Not to Fee

 

If you have ever been to a church where the preacher exclaims from the pulpit “Somebody’s gonna be mad at me tonight!” or similar for telling the truth, you will understand it when I say “Somebody’s gonna be mad at me tonight”. And you know what, luxeling?  That’s fine by me, because I’m going to how it is!

 

I rarely carry cash on me.  Captain America and my mother are constantly on my case about it– but I enjoy using my cards.  For example, with one of my cards, I earn points or cash back.  That is fabulous, it’s like the gift that keeps on giving.  With others, I am extended benefits such as consumer protection, extended warranties, etc.  So when I have clients that want to pay our company or another vendor by credit card, I understand and encourage them.  In addition to the convenience, it also enters a third party into your service, so that if there is ever a problem, you can rely on their various resources to assist you.  You too may have a card that allows you to earn points or cash back that allows you to save for something for your new home after you are married or even your honeymoon. 

So, as you can imagine, when I review contracts or research vendors, it irritates the lipstick out of me to see them charging clients fees to take their credit cards.  In addition to being bad business, it is also illegal in some states and goes against virtually every merchant agreement that credit card companies have in place.

Why on earth would you charge a client to pay you?   (Here it comes….Somebody’s gonna be mad at me tonight!)

Credit card payments are secure, reliable and give the vendor quick access to their money.  Extra fees tacked on to the retail price of your service or product is to cover the merchant fee that the vendor is being charged for accepting credit cards.  Charging clients a fee, whether a percentage of the payment or what you consider a “nominal” fee, is ridiculous.  It’s the price of doing business– just like business licenses, pencils, internet service, etc.  Vendors have two legitimate choices:  1.)”Roll” the fees into the overall cost of their service to offset such a fee, or 2.) Claim the fee at the end of the year on your taxes.  The third option of nickel and diming your clients for your responsibilities as a business owner is just bad business. Some vendors may rely on their own personal experiences where they have gone to gas stations or fast food establishments where they were charged a fee for using their card.  When I hear this, I typically ask, “Were you happy with it?”  and “Why did they do that?”  Typically, the answers I hear are “No” and “I don’t know”.  So in addition to copying something that they have no idea why it is being done, some vendors are looking to also irritate and inconvenience their own customers in a similar way they were irritated and inconvenienced. 

 

From Visa:

“Visa merchants are not permitted to establish minimum transaction amounts, even on sale items. They also are not permitted to charge you a fee when you want to use your Visa card.”

From MasterCard (page 124 of the MasterCard Rules agreement section 5.9 Prohibited Practices)

A Merchant must not directly or indirectly require any Cardholder to pay a surcharge or any part of any Merchant discount or any contemporaneous finance charge in connection with a Transaction. A Merchant may provide a discount to its customers for cash payments. A Merchant is permitted to charge a fee (such as a bona fide commission, postage, expedited service or convenience fees, and the like) if the fee is imposed on all like transactions regardless of the form of payment used, or as the Corporation has expressly permitted in writing.”

So let’s lay it on the line right now:

  1. You cannot be charged a “surcharge”, no matter what it is called (convenience fee, service fee, etc.), regardless of who your vendor uses to process their credit cards, if you are paying by Visa or MasterCard.  This also applies to debit cards bearing a major credit card company’s logo.  It violates their merchant agreement and could put their ability to take credit cards in jeopardy.
  2. You can be offered a cash discount for paying in cash as opposed to credit card.  For example, if you make a payment in cash, a vendor is entitled to offer you a discount, but that same discount does not have to be extended if you are paying by credit card. 

 

I have known some clients who obtain a line of credit strictly for their wedding.  Subsequently, this is a major source of inconvenience when they are surcharged or forced to go through other methods to remit payment.  So for those vendors wishing to continue the practice of overcharging their clients– you do so at your own peril.  More cardholders are beginning to report such instances (whether they pay the fee or not) or refuse to do business with the vendor out of sheer principle.

Cover It Up!

 

So you’ve got some awesome body art, but don’t necessarily want to showcase it on your wedding day?  No worries, you’re not alone.  Or, perhaps you are one of those brides that wants their bridesmaids to cover up their tattoos (that is another blog post altogether…) There are several products out there for you to use.

 

 

Tattoo Camo— Includes a two part system:  Camouflage paste and setting powder.  It comes in six varying shades and also has a remover tonic to help you get the heavy make up off when you’re done.  Each tube of paste and setting powder kit is 34.95.

 

Tattoo Cover Up Kit This water and smudge proof kit consists of primer, lotions, makeup and other applicators needed to temporarily cover up your tattoo.  Retails at $23.95

 

Dermablend This is my all time favorite, because it truly works. You can find it online or at your local department store, and they will even work with you to find the right shade.  I have a tattoo on my back that is fairly large and I needed to cover it for when I was competing in pageants.  I had to actually get two shades to blend and match me perfectly, but it was so worth it!  It was water and smudge proof, which was fabulous.  I definitely recommend this if you have a lot of color or shading in your tattoo.

 

When covering up your tattoo, consider your reasons for doing so.  Once upon a time, you got the tattoo as an expression of individuality and creativity.  Are you embarrassed of it now?  Will your grandmother faint?  Will your future mother-in-law silently implode?  Make sure you are doing it for all the right reasons so that you will not resent having to do it!

 

Photo from Flickr ::  Tracie Taylor Photography

Courthouse Couture

If you have decided to have a small civil ceremony, you still want everything to look and feel perfect– even if you’re in the surroundings of a courthouse or other area. In addition to looking beautiful,  you will find that there are other great places to get married at if you aren’t doing “the big wedding thing”.  Once you have your location locked in, think about your outfit. 

You so  don’t want to “T-shirt and jeans” this thing, but you know that showing up in full bridal regalia is out of the question (I have seen it happen, and it is just saaaadddd, luxelings…just sad).  Depending on your style, you have so many options– from stately to flirty to romantic to chic.  The key is finding the happy medium; you don’t want to be mistaken for counsel in a court case, but you also don’t want to look like you’re going to the prom either. 

It is completely up to you if you want to wear white or some shade of it; however finding a colored dress will increase the chances of you actually wearing it again.  If you are looking to hold some sentimental nostalgia when you look at your dress, and don’t plan on doing a larger wedding later, then opt for white or ivory. 

 

 

Kay Unger Portrait Collar Satin Sheath in Vanilla :: Adrianna Papell Shirred Dress & Bolero in Champagne :: Maggy London One Shoulder Dress in White :: David Meister Strapless Dress in White :: JS Collections Stretch Wrap Dress in Sand :: Tadashi Shutter Pleat Jersey Dress in Natural ::

 

If you want to get a little more daring with color– go for it!  There are no rules or etiquette that you have to follow, except be yourself and be beautiful!

 

 Maggy London Beaded Waist Strapless Matte Jersey Dress in Black :: Adrianna Papell Chiffon Silk Dress in Cinnamon :: Adrianna Papell Embellished Sheath & Jacket  in Eggplant :: Maggy London Faux Wrap Silk Charmeuse Dress in Envy :: D&G Dolce& Gabbana Printed Silk Organza Dress :: Suzi Chin Maggy Boutique Iridescent Taffeta Dress in Garnet :: Donna Ricco Stretch Satin Sheath Dress in Sorbet :: Tahari by Arthur S. Levine Belted Faux Two Piece Dress in Black

Concede…and Win

 

This year, I have noticed that many of you may be experiencing problems with the most important woman in your guy’s life besides you.  Yes.  His mama.  I can’t imagine how I will feel or act when my sons choose to marry; but gratefully, they will never meet a woman that is perfect enough to meet my standards and endure the rigorous obstacle course and Survivor-like challenges that I am already thinking up for her.  (FYI, my sons are 3 and 1).  

I’m just kidding.  Sorta.  Kinda.  Ok, well, not really.

When I work with couples for such a long time, it really breaks my heart to see the different changes they go through at the hands of the mothers.  Some moms (on both sides, no less)have a little trouble coming to grips with the fact that their little baby will have a new number one person in their life.  Others…for whatever reason, have their own opinions and will stop at nothing to make you and your family complete uncomfortable.  Truth be told, from what I have observed, most mothers really don’t know that they are doing some of the things that are driving you insane.  But there are others that know exactly what they are doing.  I have seen everything from mothers dropping the name and memories of ex-girlfriends at rehearsal dinner or wedding speeches to trying to upstage the bride on her wedding day to refusing to even be photographed with her or stay for the reception. 

 

It happens.

 

You usually get a glimpse during the planning period.  While this may give you pause to truly consider if this is a family you want to marry into, you will soon find that your man makes it worthwhile….as long as you only have to talk to “her” once a year.  However, how you choose to handle the little challenges during your planning will preface the relationship you will have with her, and vicariously the rest of his family at the start of your marriage.  This is important because there will be many Thanksgivings, Christmases and dear God, babies(!!) that will follow after your wedding day.  Here are some tips to deal:

 

  1. Be realistic—  Try to see things from her point of view, which will be hard, but it will help you with your plan B in your method of dealing with the madness.  Try to decide if something that she is doing, saying, something, etc. is out of sheer meanness, jealousy or ambivalence.  Then, decide if it is something you can live with her having or doing (for example, she wants his sisters in the bridal party or she wants a huge family portrait of her family done by the photographer after the ceremony) or if it is something that you can compromise with.
  2.  Avoid being bratty— We know it’s your wedding day, but it is still a special day for her and her son too.  Try not to pivot all of your objections on the “But it’s my wedding!” argument or fall on your sword too often.  When you compromise, compromise fairly. 
  3. Remember, your honey is in the middle—  He is seriously between a rock and hard place, and will get it from all sides if he doesn’t do exactly what either of you want.  However, his mother is his responsibility, and he should be the first person to let her know that her behavior is unacceptable (if it truly is). 
  4. Communicate openly, and honestly—  If email is the best way for you to express yourself,
  5. SOS— if she, or even you, aren’t dealing with a full deck at the time of a predicament, it’s best that you two not even communicate.  Use an intermediary.  If your fiance isn’t making much leeway, ask your mother for help, if you feel she can be unbiased (or at least give the appearance).  She will be able to argue your case, as well as appeal as another mother.

 

If all else fails, put her in the “igg box”.  Designate some friends or family play wedding bouncer and keep you away from any drama on the wedding day.  They can instantly scoop you away to “a very pressing matter”.  Enjoy your day– even though it is about the merging of two families, it is also the celebration of the love of two people.  Keep your eyes on the prize and you’ll make it through!

 

:: Photo Source ::