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St. Simons Wedding Planner :: Island Destination Weddings | Overheard at Your Wedding: “I’m Bored”
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Overheard at Your Wedding: “I’m Bored”


Ugh, I know.  It’s tragic.


You’ve spent all of this money on food, entertainment and decor—yet, your guests are looking at their watches, pleading with their eyes for you to cut the cake so they can get out of Dodge.  Why?  Well, for several reasons. But the one blaring is that they are bored senseless.  As a destination wedding planner in a beautiful area, I always encourage my couples to really make the party as fun as possible.  You have a lot of guests that have traveled a long way to celebrate.  To be bored while attending an event they have spent heavily on is sacrilege.

Here are some suggestions for to avoid the “zzz’s factor” during your reception:


  • Don’t front load—Unless your timeline specifically calls for it and cannot be rearranged, avoid piling everything at the beginning of your reception.  Some couples think it’s best to get “everything out of the way” by doing the first dance, father-daughter dance, mother-son dance and cake cutting all at the same time.  It doesn’t have the same effect that you think it will. For example, your father-daughter dance will seem endearing for the first few moments, but will lose its meaning when piled together with other events.  Think of doing your first dance as soon as you are announced, and then move to dinner.  By keeping your guests intrigued and interested in the events to come, you can keep their attention.  Otherwise, you risk performing for guests and having them sit through it, instead of enjoying it with you.
  • Choose music that everyone will like—Once you receive your response cards, take a look at your guests. You know their likes and dislikes. Keep your must-play list balanced and try not to cater to one portion of your guest list. For example, we had a great reception with a few older guests, but a majority were young and excited about being at the reception. The couple and their parents requested that certain music not be played, out of respect for the older guests.  The only problem is that the younger guests were bored out of their minds and were turned away each time they made requests with the DJ. 
  • Get people involved–  If you have traditions to your culture or family, definitely include your guests!  At one of our weddings, the groom and his brother performed the dabke to traditional Palestinian music.  Even though they were the only two of their culture at the entire wedding, they had every single guest on the dance floor with them, learning and performing the dance. If you don’t have or know a traditional dance—learn one, and teach it to your guests! It truly beats YMCA or The Chicken Dance.
  • Keep people moving, but together–  Think about having different locations for your cocktail hour and reception. This is perfect if you are having your wedding on some interesting and aesthetic grounds.  Allow your guests to explore different areas and not be confined to one spot.  The same can be achieved on a smaller scale with bars and stations.  Keep your guests moving and increase their mingling ratio.  Be sure to keep them together, though.  Guests can feel slighted if they are, or even feel, like they  are, separated from the rest of the party.  Be sure to take this into account when considering the logistics and floor plan of your day.


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  • So true! This is a great post. I was a guest at a wedding where guests stayed in the same seats for ceremony, cocktail hour and reception – all in the same room. And then someone had the impromptu asinine idea for each table to toast the couple, except nobody was prepared and it was extremely awkward. All of this led to the cake cutting happening so late, pushing back the start of the dance music and really leaving only 90 minutes or so for a dance party. As a planner, it was extremely difficult keeping my mouth shut thru all of these missteps!

    April 29, 2009 at 1:56 pm
  • Yes, yes, yes! This are excellent tips!

    I have found that a great deal of guests just aren’t down with the ultra-formal wedding. They tend to get very bored. That said, I am all about encouraging clients to make sure their wedding is fun and not too structured with everything happening back to back. I say only do this if you want your event to be short-lived. I almost always schedule the first dance so that the couple goes directly into once announced, followed by welcome speeches, and then the first course. And then, we schedule other events equally spaced out around the courses.

    I also agree with you about choosing music that will suit most everyone. Another tip if the they will have a bit of older guests is to have the members of the bridal party to go up and ask them to dance, so that they don’t feel left out. A bride’s mom wanted to do this at an event last summer because there were several widows attending and I have sinced incorporated the idea at other weddings. It fun and it works!! So, even if the the music wasn’t their cup of tea, the older guests have been inclined to dance when asked by the youngsters.

    April 29, 2009 at 2:16 pm
  • You are so right. Too many brides are just so focused on what they want that the wedding turns out to be a dud.

    April 29, 2009 at 9:54 pm
  • Great Suggestions Terrica! I think that is why some couples try to stay clear of the traditional wedding details. A unique touch here and there can make a big difference too. If the wedding is unique guests will stay awake.

    April 30, 2009 at 9:16 am
  • All true! Couples also need to be aware of this when they’re planning a destination wedding. I often find there is a 1 – 1.5 hr “hump” between the time that jetlag really kicks in, and the start of the “second wind”. If the music isn’t pumping, or some other type of attention-grabber isn’t happening at that time, tired guests begin to give in to the fatigue and start to get restless and want to go home. If you keep them energized, up and out of their chairs for that period, once their second wind kicks in, they’re yours for pretty much the rest of the evening!

    May 3, 2009 at 2:02 pm
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