St. Simons Wedding Planner :: Island Destination Weddings | Oh No You Di-n’t!
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Oh No You Di-n’t!

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I love this little lass; she’s a cutie.

 

We can all agree that people say stupid things. When they say stupid things about your wedding… Mmm, it can be a tad bit annoying and conflicting. But what if it is a vendor?  How do you deal with that? Easy. You get your hand on your hip, hold up your right hand, point your index finger, roll your neck and say "Oh no you di-n’t!"

Ok. So I’m joking.

Sorta.

So let’s explore the stupid things vendors say when they should just say "Congratulations on your engagement" and leave you alone:

With our service, you don’t even need a wedding planner/coordinator!Oh no you di-n’t!  How would YOU (the vendor) know?  It irritates the lipstick out of me when I hear a vendor say this to the client not knowing what their wedding entails– the details, the relationships, the design concepts, etc.  So when the DJ tells you that his services are THAT good that you don’t need a planner or a coordinator, seriously ask him (or her) when would be the best time to contact him about invitation wording for when your mother has remarried and your father has passed away and you want them both on the invite.  Then ask him what particular shade of red makes tiffany blue pop– raddichio or barn red?  Better yet, ask him how he plans to get the lipstick out of your dress prior to the ceremony…and prior to his schedule arrival.

Call me and let me know what he says.

You’re going with THAT {insert what you want here}?!:  Oh no you di-n’t!  I have several patented responses, but my favorite is, "Well, if you like {what they want}, you are more than welcome to buy it for me!"  Remember, it’s your wedding…and while everyone and their fabmother will have an opinion on what you should be doing, it happens.  However, when they become rude or condescending about a choice hat you chose and is dear to you– that’s what I have a problem with.  It’s your wedding. Do what you want.  Even if it is the McWedding, it’s still your special day…and if you like, it I love it, and I’ll make it happen for you. All your vendors should feel this way.  After all, you pay us to feel this way. Not to play Tim Gunn.

 

You paid how much for THAT {Another wedding service that you’ve already contracted}!? I know someone who got the same thing for much less!:  Oh no you di-n’t!  Not only do they get a "ONYD", but they get to help themselves to a free cup of "Shut the Hell Up".  This irritates me as well, because nothing will drive a bride more insane than to have her decision to hire a vendor questioned by another vendor she is considering.  It’s kind of like when your mom would say "Eat your peas. There are children starving in Mongolia".  I was always the smart one that said "Name one".  Of course, that landed me in my room, but the same premise is true for your vendors.  Tell them to name one or to prove it.  You will find that a majority of the time that price is old, based on different circumstances that don’t apply to your situation or is just a fabrication.  It’s not the florist’s job to grill you as to how much you paid for your DJ or why you chose to fly this particular one from Kalamazoo. 

Their correspondence looks like this:

Your package is $7500. I require 50% down.

Mr. Photographer.

 

Oh no you di-n’t! What ever happened to common courtesy?  What does a girl have to do to get a decent salutation around here?  When asking for an exorbitant amount of money, is it really too much to ask for a little personality, courtesy and dare I say it…professionalism?  If your vendor is that self absorbed and can’t muster up enough niceties to speak to you the way a client should be spoken to, you can best believe, girlfriend, that come wedding time, you will HATE him.

 

We don’t do contracts…Don’t worry, we’ll be there:  Oh no you di-n’t!  It astounds me that some vendors honestly think that someone is going to fork over hundreds, if not thousands on a hope and a prayer that they will show up.  Honey, please!  No one is falling for that– I don’t care how long they’ve been in business, that just doesn’t fly.  If at any time a vendor drags their feet on getting you a contract, leave them. They either don’t want to work with you or aren’t business savvy. Nothing good will come out of it.  Remember, a contract protects you and them.  I’m sure they are lovely people and are so very nice.  However, see how nice you think they are when they fall through.  Let me now how that works out for you.

 

That’s not my job or You don’t pay me enough to…Oh no you di-n’t!   Let’s put it on the table– most vendors feel like this, but they shouldn’t say it or say it in a way that is completely and utterly rude. But let’s also put it on the table that you don’t own anyone that day either.  But if it is something small like relaying a message to another member of the event staff, moving an item (not a large one, FYI),  doing a little extra (like taking additional pictures during the shoot with some special VIPs or playing a special request or making an announcement, or even help with bustling a dress) is just a nice thing to do…and you want nice people working with you on your wedding day, not egomaniacs or Mordecai from Children of the Corn.

 

As always, I can’t stress enough to you how important it is to pay attention to the service and/or treatment you receive prior to signing a contract.  I have seen a lot of brides who put up with substandard or downright rude treatment from vendors because they "love" their work or it’s their dream venue. Can it, toots.  That dream will soon turn into a nightmare, and you will resent writing those checks.  And stand up for yourself!

If something is about to transpire that you know is wrong or have a gut feeling is wrong, put that index finger up, honey and say "Oh no you di-n’t!" and write and tell me all about it!

12 Comments
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12 Comments

  • FANTASTIC read, Terrica!!

    May 8, 2008 at 11:33 am
  • Hear, hear!

    I just started working with a DJ who advertises being a reception coordinator…no wedding coordinator needed. Sigh.

    May 8, 2008 at 1:26 pm
  • You hit the nail on the head with these scenarios. I, especially, do not get the no contract needed deal. There is not that much trust in world. Super post!

    May 8, 2008 at 1:51 pm
  • hahaha! great post….and yes, some DJ’s in our area say…..”no wedding coordinator required”.

    May 8, 2008 at 3:01 pm
  • Awesome post! It’s amazing to me that even people inside our industry have these misconceptions of what we do. That’s just crazy!

    May 8, 2008 at 5:53 pm
  • Your posts never cease to be informative and funny, with just a touch of sarcasm :).

    May 8, 2008 at 6:43 pm
  • lol, I love how you get your point across! 😆

    May 8, 2008 at 7:18 pm
  • You call it like it is as always Terrica. Thank you.

    May 8, 2008 at 8:41 pm
  • Awesome Terrica!

    I would love a sound file of you saying Oh no you di-n’t! to play in these situations. The Aussie accent just can’t pull it off!

    May 8, 2008 at 10:24 pm
  • “Mordecai from Children of the Corn!” Wow! Your wit is amazing!

    On the serious side, you are always on target!

    May 11, 2008 at 6:28 pm
  • Oh YES you did!!
    You rock!!! I could just throw a 2 year-old-missing-a-nap tantrum when I hear someone say “You don’t need a planner / coordinator because WE can take care of that for you.”

    #1 industry pet peeve!

    May 12, 2008 at 2:47 pm
  • It’s about time someone put this out there!
    I recently ran into this one, regarding an already booked vendor, “Oh, they’re a little lower end than we usually work with.” Seriously? Well you need to be taken down a notch or two so working with them will do you good.

    May 21, 2008 at 9:07 am

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